hoo boy so much has been happening in the past few days. lots of great house parties and movies! mystic river is a fantastic show! you should all go watch it NOW!! the intensity is unimaginable. and i cried! well one tear is considered crying right? and so many angelina jolie movies recently too. i think 4 or 5 already. and i think she is really quite gorgeous. her eyes! i still don't like her lips much though.

ok let's see... hari raya dinner on sunday which was really fun and the food rocked! the guys had a match on monday. pretty good... but it was so hot. i was really browning in the sun. and today was my first day at jobshadowing! dover park hospice. haha the lady who briefed us this morning was so funny. she insisted she couldn't remember our names so she kept calling jianhong 'hong1'! haha it was so funny. as for me she couldn't even remember 1/3 of my name. oh well. i 'shadowed' a medical social worker today. eye-opening. i think the scariest part of the day was when i sat through 2 admission interviews. [when the hospice staff talk to the relatives of patients about the illness etc] gosh it was so... i don't know how to say it. but i really felt like crying when i sat there. i mean can you imagine if you are the relative listening to a doctor/nurse tell you that your siblings/parents are going to die REALLY SOON? possibly in just a few days. i really don't think i could take it. but there were all these everyday working class ppl having to hear that they should try to fulfill any last wishes. as soon as possible because you never know what will happen the next day. oh oh i feel so sad already. it probably sounds really stupid when you read this but if you were actually sitting in that room watching their facial expressions change... i don't think i want to work at a hospice next time. even as wonderful a thing as it is. i don't want to just alleviate people's pain. i want to save people.